On the Saturday before Christmas I felt a little lost.  There were too many random items on the schedule and so many possibilities to fill in the gaps that I operated in a daze most of the time, unsure of where to focus. The next day, however, had just the right amount of structure with church in the morning and open space in the afternoon to deal with the urgency of Christmas Eve approaching.  I made an agenda and lived into it, even though I did not complete it all.  I felt happy and alive that day.

The contrast between the two days helped me remember that I do better with an agenda.  It is sometimes fun to float freely through a non-busy portion of the day, and I need these times now and then.  But too much free floating leads to dissatisfaction and even a sinking into a perplexing sadness, the kind that makes you want to shake yourself — “You are so blessed!  You have so much, and today you even have time.  Why are acting like this?”

This past term was a heavy one in terms of teaching load and adjusting to new administrative responsibilities.  I teach a bit less next term, with an intense May term course to follow.  There will be plenty to do, but with a less harried daily schedule I know I will need to be very agenda-driven to use my time well.

So as we move into the New Year, I’m making some agenda.  Resolutions are wonderful but often seem to fade into February or March for me.  Agenda, however, has a way of providing a flexible structure. Agenda can be easily unrealistic, but usually there is some built-in grace — if one agenda item is not met, it can likely work just as well the next day or week or month.

Agenda works best for me when I share it with others, whether at the start of a class, lesson, meeting, afternoon with my family, or here. In my next post I’ll share my New Year Agenda.